I'm having a debate with **** over whether or not he is gay... what's your verdict?
GAY or at the very least bisexual.
His "joking around" with all of his roommates is clearly as act. He needs to step back and reevaluate his sexual orientation.
Weird... you've rode him.
one more question, do you know why i woke up with 5 pounds of quarters, nickels and dimes in my pocket?
i now have a sippy cup solely for the purpose of drinking alcohol out of...am i an alcoholic?
I'm not sure what's more surprising, the fact that she said I reminded her of Danny Devito, or the fact that it got me laid.
I'm tired of stuffing my fat into a slutty costume. Next year let's go as homeless girls. Cute ones. In leggings with camel toe.
drinking right out of the bottle and nobody bats an eye.
its good to be home.
I sent her a picture of Richard Nixon and said "these are the only dick pics I send".
WHERE THE FUCK'S MY FUCKING RITALIN YOU FUCKING FASCIST?????
I'm actually kind of scared about the prospect of us living together. We're just going to eat pizza and drink wine before retiring to our rooms with vibrators
Nothing has ever been more true. Ever.
We were right in the middle of sex and all of a sudden his kids toy story action figure starts talking "I think the word your searching for is Space Ranger." A literal Buzz kill. It was equally creepy and hilarious.
I told my dad that he was in a band and he was all like " good job" and then he looked up the band and listened to their music and just went " oh have you disappointed me"
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.
I got arrested in a leprechaun onesie
While buying Plan B the lady at the counter looked at me and said hope you have a successful night as I walked away in shame
Do it!! We better have a duck by the time I get home.
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