On imdb the canadians say It's amazing
I just realized that "Hey girl, when you gonna let me tap that?" is in iambic pentameter. I'm going to write a poem...
There are only two things that should be in vaginas... penises and vegetables
I just lost $50 at the races, got drunk, and woke up to my ex-gf. Apparently the good decisions kept on rolling...
Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
I am officially out of liquor stores within a 15 mile radius that don't recognize me as soon as I walk in the door.
I got stoned in my snow covered car and pretended I was burried alive
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
I remember saying your puke looked like a jellyfish and you got very offended.
I bet he'd be real motivational during sex. And he'd probably make you call him superman.
Yesterday I dumped him, went out for my birthday, hooked up with someone else, and today he still fed my cat. Living with your ex ain't so bad . . .
You know the cave of wonders in Aladdin? That's how I feel about his apartment. Except with blow and other treasures.
Sorry about the Christmas balls dude. At the time I thought they were festive as fk but I see now I've just spent too much time on the internet
Nothing like a little chlamydia diagnosis to ring in the new year
You took the glass microwave plate and said it was the closest thing to a frisbee, let me know how that works out for you
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