so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
You should come over. I am making a celebratory I got laid by a huge penis cake.
When she talks to me all I hear are 5 generations of inbreeding speaking.
Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife.
he walkred up to the manager at dennys and said 'look, my friends passed out in your bathroom, can i go get her?'
He just turned 21, it's very obvious the end of their relationship is near. Now we play the waiting game.
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
Yours weakened by children. Mine weakened by a forearm sized cock for 8 years.
My dating life has become some fucked up hydra of dicks; you cut one off and two pop up in its place.
hahahaha what do we need the kangaroos for? please tell me we release them instead of doves
You're too young to have this sort of Grizzled Old Drunk In Roadside Bar wisdom.
Then he said,"I love you like a sister I like to have sex with."
I feel like ditching all logic and responsibility and get shit-faced before the week's over. Thoughts?
Dad is celebrating turning 45 by being drunk in a department store before two o'clock.
I only gave you one rule about using the beach house: don’t get cum on anything!
You’ve seen my tits! You had to know that rule was unrealistic! Does it help that he was really cute?
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