well i did feel guilty about it. until i saw how hot the guy was the next day. now, nothing but pride.
sitting in an airport in detroit. just saw a commercial for detroit tourism with kid rock as a spokesman. reason # 1458 to never visit this city.
I'm drinking Dom Perignon from the bottle with a straw just to piss of some french dude.
I think I may have appendicitis, but the house is like two blocks from the hospital so I'm just gonna go and drink anyway.
Update: still drunk enough to get lost in Zellers and to think my reflection was my mother. Awesome day.
Oh, and thanks to you. I'm now stuck in the living room, held hostage, listening to my roommate's "How I discovered I was bi" story. FUCK YOU.
she did 8 shots of vodka. THROUGH A SIPPY STRAW
I have got to meet this girl.
it wasn't sex so much as.....a disastrously uncomfortable sexual experience
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
So was this before or after he cried about trump?
After
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
Who is this? I have a text from you last night telling me your name and to train hard for Tuesday, please make this make sense
I'm sittin in my Hawaiian shorts watching the office eating cold asparagus. wow do I suck when you're not here.
Randomize
