Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
but why does your life always sound like the plot of a porn?
two words: eviction party
She asked me to facebook all the girls I'd hooked up with. She started crying when I started my search with A.
you know you made it when your beer pong table is made from imported italian hardwood
I don't have any food so I made a martini so I could eat the olives. Don't tell me I can't think outside the box.
He just texted me from the outside of the hospital. He called the fat broad in the bar mrs snuffleupagus about 60 times and she broke a bottle of blackberry brandy over his head.
I just ate a dove chocolate and the wrapper said "chocolate: always your valentine" WHAT KIND OF JACKASS WRITES THESE AND WHY MUST THEY MOCK ME?
Apparently he crashed because 3 different girls were trying to give him road head at the same time.
her mom went out of her way to book us a room with separate beds... her level of gay denial is in beast mode
Stop calling my penis "Fat Jesus"
I will teach you the ways of the ho life, my little gay grasshopper.
I just traded sex to frolic with a box of husky puppies. Is this rock bottom?
Randomize