So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
then he said "your boobs looked so much bigger on girls gone wild"
I forgot about that,good spring break.
Next time we're there I want drunk pics of us trying to ride the stone lions downtown. Don't even attempt to fight me on this.
He bought me dinner. He gave me his jacket when I was cold. And then ate me out in the passenger sear of the car.
I'm really sorry I gave you road head last night and made you drive over and break the sprinkler system.
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
It summer and it's getting a lot harder to hide sex bruises from my parents.
First world problems?
Wait, you seriously DON'T keep vodka in your backpack??!??!?
My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis.
yo knit me an eyepatch. but also make it usable as a thong
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
The chances of me making out with someone next weekend are about the same as me not remembering it.
I ate so much cake that I can't even enjoy a blowjob
That's the most first world problem I've ever heard in my life.
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
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