The whole way homeyou were flapping your arms up and down, and when I asked why you said you were trying to tell Tony Danza about the angels.
rubbing her clit was like playing thumb war
Walt I've been the third wheel taking shotssssssssssssssssolo. Each s is for each solo shot.
You said you were going to take the sideview mirror to your own car so that nobody would steal it. Thats why you woke up with it.
Thanks, girl! That means a lot. I can't wait to share my jail stories with you over salad and cupcakes.
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
He accidentally opened the car door during sex and all the lights came on. Needless to say, that kid passing by who was walking his dog got scarred for life.
He came in two seconds and stole my pizza so I'm not counting it.
Can we talk about the fact that a stranger is doing a line of coke off our living room table right now?
Apparently mid making out I got up and said "I need to figure out my life" went in the bathroom and threw up for two hours.
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
Idk what y'all are doing but I just want you to know I'm home and if I hear him say "slap it" one more time I'm moving out
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
Randomize
