I was taking a piss and started puking. I pissed myself and made a mess in the bathroom. Passed out, then got up and went back out from 11pm to 5am.
I changed 4 diapers and slept horribly in our hot apt. Now, I'm at my inlaws house watching the Rangers get pummeled. Oh how our lives differ.
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
decided to have an easter egg hunt this year. the golden egg has weed in it and all the others have shots of vodka. who said we were too old for easter?!?
My mom gave me a book called "why good people do bad things"
I didn't realize you were one of the "good people"
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
Oh god, so much rum. I think I was in a shotgun wedding with a Bacardi promotion girl.
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
Guess who woke up with a hangover this morning? The same person whose parents found out and woke her up by banging pots and pans with wooden spoons.
If it makes you feel any better, I had my finger up some guy's butt today... Dominatrix training, ya know...
possibly one of my favorite moments was wiping it off your nose after you high fived a bouncer
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
Giving you good advice and being naked are not mutually exclusive.
He said I gave him the best head he's ever had and I bowed. I BOWED.
Post breakup Disney World may be my best idea ever! Tinkerbell just grabbed my dick and gave me a kiss! This really is the happiest place on earth!
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
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