So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
i'm drinking out of my 'black like my president' mug
Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
Only in this snowstorm did have I realized the lengths I'll go to to get laid.
And then she apologized after the blow job for being too sick to deep throat. I'm in love..
votre penis est TRES GRAND. i used vous because your penis is SO big
She just landed. Popped over for a BJ and left. I'm a fan of layover layovers.
No you usually just ranted about the voicemail bitch until she cut you off again
We haven't even scratched the surface on the damage we could do. Just saying
She acts like a 3 year old but with fantastic tits. This girl is the reason women are objectified
So which one of you fuckers changed my backgrounds while I was passed out to me holding a chicken like the statue of liberty?
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
It's statistically impossible for there not to be at least one guy sexting you right now
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
I'm sorry I couldn't bail you out, apparenty they dont take credit cards over the phone. Did you at least make any friends in jail?
Randomize
