You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
I have been standing totally still for the past 6 minutes because I was convinced my foot was tied to the ground. It turns out it was a string of hair strewn across my foot
His hands were made for my vagina.
I also referred to her clitorous as her "vagina dot" last night...probably going to be dumped soon.
You threw a bunch of trashcans into the middle of the street and nothing happened. I fell on one car and suddenly there were cops everywhere...
You kind of have a nervous, desperate thing going on that isn't exactly catnip for bitches
I went in to wake you up this morning and you had a condom draped across your throat like a necklace. There were no boys in the house last night, what were you doing?
He sat on me and said I owed him $10, when I asked why he just said "lap dance"
I responded with "neat-o burrito" to his SEXT...he tried so hard and I just panicked.
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
Saying I've had more balls in my mouth than you is the last clear, coherent thing I remember.
A stranger came up to me, pointed at my drink and asked what it tasted like and proceeded to chug half of it and then walked away.
I'm really tired of this guy walking his chicken in my neighborhood.
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
Randomize
