My penis is bigger than his and I don't even have a penis.
I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
are you drunk enough to hook up with me yet?
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
Getting 10 cents back for every can is really just encouraging alcoholism.
My professor just gave everyone in the class extra credit... except for the kid wearing the Cubs hat
Got free coffee because I told the guy at starbucks the pleats in his khaki pants made his cock look big.
My life has only gotten better since they built a playground behind the bar
Evidently I told a girl she should leave the bar because no one wanted to fuck her.
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
I had a dream he was standing in front of me naked and flexing while yelling VICTORY and gizzing all over the floor.
tell me you did not just describe yourself as "hot and bothered"
I'm not sure. But he has a pet sugar glider. So, points either way
As long as that's not his name for his dick.
JB just got pulled over and I am in the trunk...... this isnt good
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