is it odd that your cat looks tougher than you?
i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
you missed kickoff and the first round of bodyshots. I suggest you get here now.
Ya,, he does have virgin eyes. Thats a real thing you know...
Apparently drunk me thinks it's a good idea to put drops of acid in assorted open drinks in the fridge... This should be a fun week.
How do I tell my Dad that in the picture he has of me and my brother as the background of his phone we were both rolling face on ecstasy?
Like fighting the continuous urge to sing Neil diamond "coming to America" kinda fucked up right now
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
I've slept in a different bed every day this week. Operation Ho Ho Ho is a success!
Speaking of boners I learned how to say " jizz everywhere" in sign language
After fooling around at the hotel til dawn, I managed to feed her with my free buffet passes. Tastes like sweet victory.
You let the ASEXUAL teach sex Ed?!
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