that's fine. btw we still need $500 for the donkey...
yes, the chronicles of narnia is exactly what happens when you do crack inside of a wardrobe.
I jsut got pulled over and passed the sobritaty test.
Good thing spelling doesn't count.
I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
4pm on a Sunday....roomate fucking like a wildabeast while I have a organic chemistry study group in my kitchen.
He's crying and calling me out on using him. It's awful. And I'm too drunk to leave.
walking around pouring bird seed on passed out guys in the quad.
I'm pretty sure I just woke up to one of the airport janitors saying that she wanted to tie me up and do something.. I couldn't hear what, thank god
Please God, is a penis possibly making it to vagina town to much to ask for tonight.
I'm about to airblow my boyfriend. I'll three-way you.
Drunk life lesson just learned the hard way: do not try to play hump the great dane. He may take you up on it.
Also, I found out that my dad has the name of every boy that I've ever dated and their physical description, car type and tag number stored in his computer.
Apparently Angela went missing once and he says he learned were to look first and that it's best to have information on hand.
My boob is missing a layer of skin
I offer naked tickle fights and orgasms and you call it trouble. I call that Christmas.
Damn that sucks I haven't needed pants the whole time i've been here
Randomize
