i think im having one of those erections lasting four or more hours
Dude you can sell sperm for 100 to 250 bucks a time. And the best part is there will be kids all over the world that will have me as a daddy. It's like I'm jerking off my way into ruling the world
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
you broke a plate. told her her wedding china was ugly and you were doing her a favor. then proceeded to break every plate you could get your hands on.
Just KTHXBAIed an old man for staring at me
We got jeff a deep fryer for his bday. So far the count is two potatoes and your iPod.
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
In that case, I'll try 2 find a date. But my options are AA friends or fuck buddies.
Some people say 6pm is too early to get drunk. To them I say this dinner is delicious.
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
This guy smelled his armpits before trying to approach me at the bar
I don't need a lecture. I'm 41. I know I'm an idiot.
Hooked up with a straight guy while dressed as a man. I'm unstoppable.
It was get out of line and go pee and get no beef briskit. Or stay in line, pee my pants, but have beef briskit. I really wanted my beef briskit
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
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