I had to fart so bad so i let it go hoping it would be quiet, it was loud and shit came out!!! and i couldnt leave because her parents were behind me
Oh please. You given/recieved a handjob out in public. I think that shy ship has sailed.
There was a canoe full of alcohol. It was literally a boat load of fun
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
Thank god Shes going home for winter break, gives my dick a chance to recover from those "bjs." Youd think a senior could suck a dick by now.
the scent of your tears make me crave pizza
I AM HANGING OUT WITH ADORABLE DOGS SURROUNDED BY NATURE. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND ALSO BYE CIVILIZATION AND PANTS.
Are you at a park?
can we just punch him in the dick and call it a victory for feminism
Who'd have thought a guy with a lisp would be so good with his tongue?
When you left the bar, you did two cartwheels and a heel click and RAN ALL THE WAY HOME.
If they could bottle a hangover it would taste exactly like lemon lime Gatorade and failed hopes and dreams
The exact people you expect to find at a bar at 2pm are here. Come visit. We'd really like the company.
So I'm at home coloring while smoking a joint. It can only go down hill from here.
Idk I've taught my 18 month old how to say nipple so kids aren't all bad
How's moving going?
Uh, we're on the way to the store to buy more booze
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