You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
I made a google map for "places I got blow jobs"
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
He seriously just asked the doctor if taking the medicine for chlamydia was going to cut into his drinking time. Never let it be said that he is not dedicated.
I just found like 5 packs of sparklers. If someone doesn't get set on fire tonight I am retiring from party hosting.
I couldn't help thinking that my sock monkey was judging me
Thanks, college. Tonight's decisions brought to you by margs in a nalgene.
The kid across the hall found me in the hallway using a hot pocket box as a pillow. I said its okay I live here.
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
I am so proud of him. After eating the rest of our shrooms, he finally registered to vote
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
Just had to read the instructions to my microwave. How am I so high?
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
I love you. Doing a double. Going to die. It will be painful. Let the world know i partied. God, did i party.
Randomize