Stage 55 clinger. not a typo. I cannot even believe this shit.
he came within less than a minute of me blowing him. this was our second night hanging out in a row. for an almost 30 year old italian man, he is NOT living up to his country's reputation
Held my professor's hair back while she was puking. I'd better get an A out of this or else the pics are going on Facebook.
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
Tonights drinking will be celebratory and victorious. Picture the end of The Mighty Ducks set to beer.
We need a full length mirror. I just ate it trying to look at my shoes on the toilet. But aside from a arm bruise I'm good to go
All I'm saying is that any 24 year old guy who sends me a snapchat from the vantage point of his dick with the caption "hiding behind my weiner" is off my list potentially dateable guys.
He came over apologized for his lack of sexual skills. Cleaned my kitchen cooked me dinner. And gave me another one minute stand. I think im okay with this
Sent him a nude and I forgot to crop out the Jesus picture in the background. The Catholic guilt is too real.
I apologize that you just fell victim to my random thought of how to make a blow job come to life via emojis.
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
You can't just say "I scored us a potential threesome" and then not text me back.
The minute he showed me his Mumford and sons tattoo is the minute i could literally feel my pussy dry up
Just calm down. My foot long super joint and I will be over shortly.
Randomize
