Dude.. I don’t care how hairy she is, you already left me at the bar, and now I have to find another fucking way home... NOW BE A MAN ABOUT IT!
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
Eating in charleston sc at a seafood place called "hymans". Like normal I had no problem finding it.
I think I just tested my sobriety limits for unicycling.
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
I refuse to have sex with you and your eBay condoms.
I seriously think my heart may fail. And I didn't even grab a toilet beer :(
She's planning a December wedding, I'm planning on a June breakup.
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
So I've discovered that being hungover at 25 feels the same as being hungover at 24. Happy Birthday to me.
We need to get fucked up again and play games like "save the tequila but dodge the knife"
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
I had sex with him for the first time drunk, dressed in a toddler overall tutu costume, at 2pm. Horrible start.
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
You know its a good morning when you wake up with blonde hair extensions in your pocket. . .
Randomize
