Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
Just crossed the line with my beat friends girl twinsie. Didn't realize tillz afta how much the look alike and an thougholy creeped out. Thanks ciroc
I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
I'm drinking Dom Perignon from the bottle with a straw just to piss of some french dude.
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
Bartender just fed me brownie. Its going to be a good night
I just farted in the bathroom and the guy in the stall next to me started gagging. Its a beauitful day
Guess who was PASSED OUT ON A BMW. I shit you not
Stop it right now
This time face forward
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
I'm still confused. So he's NOT your cousin by blood, but WAS your cousin, on two separate occasions, by marriage? Still too weird I think...
IF IT WALKS LIKE A MANWHORE AND QUACKS LIKE A MANWHORE, HE PROBABLY HAS VD.
Just had a VERY VIVID visualization of wrapping a pizza around my cock and fucking its brains out. Soooooo less weed more dates?
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
Kids music just accidentally came on at this party. I didn't know how many stoners were here until they all sang along.
Randomize
