They keep asking what you are doing. I told them to quit calling her "what."
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
I just realized that all of my cardio comes from dancing on tables.
I know I'm really high but I swear I just saw him beating off to his fantasy football roster.
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.
how do you play pong handcuffed?
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
I think one of your friend's offered my friend chicken tenders back at his place...just FYI he should probably come up w/ another line
This dude has batman tighty whities on over his cargo pants and he has the nerve to yell "fuck you bitch" up at my window.
sorry for the random call. He stopped mid-sex because he wanted confirmation that I was really a reverend.
Mom has wine in a to go cup. It's that kind of night.
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
help. there is a guy in a bunny costume.
So... he's my second cousin's step-bro... To do or not to do?
Randomize
