The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
You know what my problem is? I'm like a machine designed for the sole intention of removing the pants from damaged girls.
Dude, you bit through my nipple. Give it a week, damn.
I just feel like you're using me for sex.
I'm glad you finally understand the context of our relationship
You had two tasks: \n1) put on a condom \n2) text me so I don't walk in on you \nIt really isn't that hard
The guy at the bar repeatedly told us he was an off duty cop from out of town, that to normal people would be the time where you stop asking him to smoke a blunt with us
Hey mom, soo do we have a family lawyer or am I on my own for that?
I've decided that buying my first unused mattress has been my first major step into real adulthood.
The struggles of a small town man whore
I'll be wearing lingerie and holding a bottle of bourbon so pick up whatever food you think goes with that
A guy in a chewbacca suit just came up to me and asked me to buy him weed.
Randomize
