I got my nipple pierced! I love it so much!
Well, there goes breastfeeding.
my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
all I remember was being half naked drinking water on my hands and knees from her dogs water bowl.
Countdown til Saturday. I'd assume we're somewhere around 10,000 bottles of beer on the wall.
Well he asked to have a sober hang out so i guess that constitutes as a date in college
I feel like she's the kind of girl who always ends up with guys who have oddly shaped dicks..
there's another hole in my ceiling...someone fell through the attic this time....
there was a fucking fire juggler. but it was ok bc i was in the kiddie pool and it was the safe zone
I definitely hasselhoffed a taco bell burrito on my kitchen floor in front of my dad and little brother.
Her name means "flower that enlarges and gives birth." There is no way she isn't getting knocked up
WAIT DID YOU MAIL ME A KITTEN
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
Painting strippers breast and vaginas to look like easter eggs. What r u doing tonight.
Security showed up because apparently we were fucking too loud.
As your roommate I can attest that y'all do indeed fuck rather loudly
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