something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
So, when he came he screamed MORTAL KOMBAT!!!! at the top of his lungs and all of his roomates yelled back FINISH HER!!!!.....yeah kinda akward
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
This girl brought half a watermelon to class. I want to be on her level.
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
Man when i saw they were the only ones hard core grinding to the Cha Cha slide against the wall, I knew they were gonna have sex tonight.
please stop yelling "ITS NARNIAAAAAAAAA" out of our window at the lone person walking home in the snow
Well besides you comparing him to your dead cat, I'd say it was fine.
how did you know i stayed over last night?
there was a trail of glow sticks and cheetos from the front door all the way to his bedroom
151 hangover. Need apocalypse.
Take your time. I'm mowing the lawn. In the dark. Drunk.
He's a real gentleman. At least he tried to flush my closet's handle after he pissed in it.
Why let a Christmas Eve hangover ruin a perfectly good Christmas Day acid trip?
I HAD TO PAY A COVER FOR THE FIRST TIME LAST NIGHT. My tits didn't get me in and I was so pissed.
I shouldn't be allowed to be in america for NYE... or any major holiday for that matter
Randomize