she peed on how many people?
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
I thought the one perk of the low caliber of men I've slept with thus far in my college career is that I would never run into them in the library. I've been here for ten minutes and we're on number three.
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
I broke up with him in the bar & then asked him if he wanted to have a contest to see who gets the most numbers. I say I took that break up well
Eating an ice cream sandwich while your little bro gets me weed. May I adopt him?
some people popped out of a houseboat and asked us to their party. their houseboat IS A WEEDBOAT. it is full of weed they grow weed. EVERYWHERE.
I'm 99.9% sure the people upstairs are using walki-talkies to talk to each other across the room. Too high for this shit
I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.
I can't wait to get home and brush the fuck outta my teeth.
Literally.
Some girl woke me up at 1:30 am looking for weed and the next thing I know I'm in a hot tub with 3 girls, 2 40's, and a blunt.
He's like a father figure to me, except we have casual drunk sex every now and then
I cried while dry heaving in the back of the car to the New York song with jay z in it. I was singing it inbetween gags.
the fact that I always have. bottle of tequila in my purse is not helping my current sitch
why do i have a pole dance champion shot glass?
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