What do they do with the elephants that die at the zoo
Cremation, why do you ask?
I think we have a bit of a problem
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
I'm tired of stuffing my fat into a slutty costume. Next year let's go as homeless girls. Cute ones. In leggings with camel toe.
I never knew so many sexual things could be done while wearing footie pajamas
A man bought two 40's from me, then asked if I had duct tape. How do people over 50 know about Edward 40hands? It was very weird.
You're 21st was epic. I woke up at 6 a.m. on the floating beer pong table in the pool with a beer still in hand. Didn't even spill any
If God invented something better than rough, drunken, lesbian sex he kept that shit to himself.
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
Can I come by? I want you to meet my squirrel
It's shark week go big or go home
You were trust falling into bushes
You told me I got kicked out of the bar for lipping off to the bouncers... what shocked me the most was that I made it to the bar
Come over. Bring drugs. My sister is making cookies. She took Valium. They should be badass cookies.
It feels like heartburn in my lungs. I'll buy 2 pounds.
Randomize
