I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
He went so fast i didnt even have time to pretend like i was about to have a fake orgasim
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
Just so we're clear. I'm still making jello shots and bringing them to the bar in my purse. I don't care if its half off margaritas. Don't want anyone thirsty
I really wanna know when trying to grow up turned into try not to throw up.
She's using our floating beer pong table as an air mattress to sleep on.
I just brushed my teeth. In the car. With watered down Sprite. From Saturday. Multi-tasking at its finest.
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
sorry for laughing and taking pictures while you were having an asthma attack on st. patricks day
Visibly drunk girl eating alone at a souplantation just spilled salad all over her body. It was me
Before you started puking your brains out, you took a moment to give me the correct order of the Harry potter series
I'm in Florida in a retirement community the fuck am I supposed to do but watch tv and disgrace Jesus
Really I don't care what we're doing or watching. Your penis spends way too much time outside of my body.
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
Complete and utter failure. 100% unsalvageable. I have not failed so hard at a culinary endeavor in YEARS. MY HONOR IS IMPUGNED I HAVE SHAMED MY HOUSE
Randomize
