K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
i just defriended some girl because according to her status she "doesn't give a fuck about shark week."
she pooped in my shower. pooped. woke me up and said she thought she farted but it wasnt a fart i went back 2 sleep and found it hours later. no longer hooking up w chicks my moms age.
Pretty sure I just has te same conversation as you. He suggested I get, sell, and fuck the hoes, and once all was said and done, that I should refer afforementioned hoes to him, to perform felatio.
He gave a passionate hug to every tree on the way to my car.
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
i've officially fucked a sailor, a policeman and a biker. I've never noticed my Village People fetish until now...
He came in both my eyes, then refused to give me a towel unless I found him by playing Marco Polo
my roommate is sobbing and looking at photos of elephants. i'm so confused.
Guess who just screamed "Everything happens for a reason!!" in the abortion clinic. This girl.
She said I looked exactly like my dad. Then she made out with me. Should I be questionable?
I've already made the "blackout on move in day" decision
You walked in wearing nothing but a beekeeper mask
I'm in the Sheetz parking lot waiting for dad to finish a drug deal.
I’m appalled by how severely I lower my standards when I’m horny & impaired
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