sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
she quoted hannah montana in her facebook status. i will never be speaking to her in person again.
My T9 text prediction thing keeps predicting every next word is going to be "midgets".
Found him. He was passed out on the couch at the new place in a room full of burnt pizza smoke.
The lid of our salsa is promoting a contest that ended in July '09
So my girlfriend used a threesome to tell me she wanted to leave me for a girl... Not entirely sure how I should feel about that.
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
on a brighter note, the cop thought i could kick adams ass if it came down to that and said he had $20 on me if it ever happens
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
At this point, I'd date an ax murderer. So long as he doesn't cry all the time, have ED, or leave me with his unspayed cat. My list of requirements is becoming increasingly specific.
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
Um, when I went down on you it got stuck there. Still had gum in my mouth. Didn't exactly have use of my hands to assist
...i have a beer in one hand, and a chicken wing in the same. typical tuesday, right?
Randomize
