I bet he comes in French.
Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
we're drinking boxed wine and eating string cheese. It's like a wine tasting for poor people.
Shit. Come in my room. Bring a trashcan and an icepack
My mom said that if she can come this weekend, she'll buy the weed.
it's 2:30 on a sunday and I just won a wine chugging contest. I'm never graduating.
it wasnt even considered partying. it was like "ok, who can get the most shitfaced and not pass out"
We won 11 games of beer pong, and then I spent a half hour trying to get into the top bunk. Then i realized it was a cabinet in the bathroom
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
And then I fed you egg rolls in bed as you were screaming I'm moving out
Your ability to whip out your dick and take a pic anytime I text you is startling.
Had to leave my skype meeting to vomit. I'm obviously ready for the real world.
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
You told everyone to shut up then told the officer that you are 21 when you drink.
Randomize
