I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
just drove past a church sign that said "jesus got 'er done" ... welcome to the south
Sometimes I get depressed that my son is too young to understand how hot his babysitter is.
My parents showed me my IQ test from fourth grade, I'm shitting on my potential.
a cabby told me that vodka is the coors light of liquor, and then gave me his number
She just looked down there and said "i breed horses. this is better than anything ive ever seen."
Dude..this is the third year in a row me and him have fucked at a super bowl party..does that count as a tradition?
Nothing quite like pre-gaming the Kentucky Derby with adderall and adderall. I'm fairly confident I could outrun all of these fucking horses in a foot race right now.
Was behind a guy going 20 for 4 miles I'll be there as soon as the universe quits fucking me
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
hooked up with someone last night while wearing walrus pajama pants. clearly I'm accomplishing big things in life
I'm in the line at Chipotle thinking: "What combo will best prepare my body for the open bar I'm going to subject it to tonight?"
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
Randomize
