think what you will about my sexuality, just get the cigarettes
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
That's it, I refuse to live in a world where sparkly vampires beat Batman at anything.
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
Is it a good time to tell him he's getting too clingy if he sent me a picture of my name spelled with Cheerios?
How did work go after you told them you were in jail?
Great they tried to bail me out.
We had sex twice and at Wendy's how dare you diminish that.
There is an unwrapped tampon, a condom, a rubber chicken and a slim Jim currently sitting on our dining room table.
I tried to get more sleep but the universe decided I needed a drunken freshman instead
It was a simpler time. With fewer STDs.
Fuck you and fuck your stupid hat
I haven't listened to news as I've been having lesbian sex all night. Anything new?
I had a date last night. His dog threw up in his bed while we were having sex in it.
Randomize
