I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
Who would win... a chainsaw pooping pterodactyl or a bear with machine guns for feet. big debate about this right now
If this herpes test comes back negative I'm asking out the doctor.
After much deliberation I've decided to name my penis "Arthur", hope your mom's surgery goes well.
Ok the fact that you know THAT phrase perfectly is terrifying. You just proved you can slut it up in mulitiple languages.
She looked at my facebook and decided to bump the security deposit up an extra 250...now we have to destroy the house, its expected and I wouldn't want to disappoint
My ex came to my place while I was gone. Random things he took: snow shoes, my laundry quarters, a decorative picture, all my condiments, the container that held my rice and a sticker off my wallet. Then left a note saying he watered my plants and fed my cats. What. The. Fuck.
This is John, I met you downtown last night.
Oh, ok.
This is the cop that kept you out of trouble last night
If you go to Tinseltown tonight. First bathroom on the left, second stall. Avoid. It's still coming to terms with what I did to it.
You know what the worst feeling in the world is? Sitting in your 6pm AA meeting still hungover from the night before
I shaved my pussy for you. If you complain about a single hair that I missed again, you will be greeted by a bush the next time you go down on me and i will MAKE YOU KEEP GOING
If you sleep with another manager before the year is up you'll deserve an accomplishment sticker.
I think she tried to suffocate me with her tits...she almost succeeded.
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
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