What was that guy's name that you dated that wore the leotard?
So, it's like build-a-bear for your vag?
He asked what my name was on facebook chat. IT SAYS RIGHT THERE. i will never be drunk enough for this guy.
I feel like after all he sees, the dog needs to get baptized.
He pulled his dick out during the Bourne Ultimatum, ruined it for me.
no. 1 rule of bromania: no females
What can I say, I'm a giver.
Smoking up the homeless at 3am does not make you a humanitarian.
And I think your bro would be happy to know that when I took my bra off like 10lbs of confetti fell out. It was like my tits were celebrating being free
He was bigger soft than my ex was hard. A gold medal rebound.
I am a woman. I need to be selective about the porn I stream on my phone. Who knows if my cell will ever get lost, who will see it and what they'd think otherwise. Keepin' it classy tampa.
I'm officially no longer allowed to make any of my own decisions regarding alcohol, men, or the combination of both. Thats up to you now. Do me proud.
Well, she yelled at the stripper that she couldn't lick whipped cream off his nipples because she is lactose intolerant.
Do you know anyone else that comes home with unexplainable injuries as many nights a week as we do?
I did not pay that kind of money so that It could be hidden. that bra needs to shine in glory so that it can be seen by the world.
Remind me to tell you: When threeways go awry, my MLK weekend story.
Randomize
