return my video game
Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
The solution to mudbutt is never ever Clorox wipes. It stings soooooooo bad.
I'm so hungover even the car commercials make me nauseas
Some girl next to me in class is making a list of whta to pack for spring break & it was a normal list until she put birth control in all caps w/ stars around it
REAL PEOPLE DRINK 3 BEERS ALONE WILL WATCHING THE LIFETIME MOVIE ABOUT PRINCE WILLIAM AND KATE MIDDLETON
everyone thought he was too sick to make it, but he showed up. Ten minutes in and he's doing vodka shots with nyquil chasers
trading diseases for a hangover? that's either a really good decision or a really, really bad one. we'll find out if he wakes up tomorrow
Happiness is the polar opposite of catching your dad watching holiday themed porn
I figured out why her friends always say g is for god when she leaves with someone. She wears a double g cup bra
like every night i go out someone always suggests nipple hugs so that's why I always end up topless
He fingered me in a Waffle House bathroom and then stole a traffic cone. Is this love that I'm feeling?
I may have just sent her dad a picture of my penis. His name's Myron, right?
I'm now forever going to blame miss frizzle for making me the sexual deviant that I am today
I woke up on a park bench with a nice homeless guy waking me up. I bought us Carl's Jr. Best birthday ever!
You tried to fight someone about spaghetti o’s?
That hungover.
Randomize
