Im def. not watching the CMAs. If Kanyes not gonna be there whats the point?
i asked if you wanted help changing your sheets after you threw up in bed. you politely declined. i take no responsibility after that.
he called AT&T to make sure that he had insurance before he threw his cell phone into the fountain.
he has a puerto rico area code and says his name is johnny cash. extremely suspect
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
I feel like I wont be making enough money to support my frivilous lifestyle of beer and mcdonalds
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
I could really do without pictures of your asses in my inbox. That said, I'm extremely jealous that I wasn't involved.
Dylan just paid 30 bucks to have himself wrapped in the clear plastic they wrap luggage in at the airport. Bring scissors.
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
I think someone tried to make a huge bowl of ramen in my bathtub. There's noodles everywhere in my bathroom.
I need to be put in a corner surrounded by pamphlets of stds and babies
That's so awful of me. Instead of comforting her I masturbated in front of my ex-boyfriend.
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
Randomize