piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
you started crying about dinosaurs being extinct
that's why i woke up holding that dina girls hand
she's a dina-saur
so all the bums hang out by my new store, they have a leader we call king bum... He got dethroned by police today for choking out a hooker. The bum heirarchy is in shambles right now.
they just named my boobs. Lefty is "Guenevere" and Righty is "I claim this boob for America"
Well, thats the first guy to go to jail because of my vagina
Post that event on your timeline
Just bought shock top, Trojans, double shots and baby oil. At 8 am. While the lady in front of me bitched about her expired coupons.
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
So it's ironically funny that my psychiatrist's office and my cocaine dealer's house are on the same street
Come on kid, foreplay is elementary stuff. It's a vagina, not a sphinx.
We should try to put a bagel on your penis
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
Don't put me in that position. I am not qualified to be the responsible adult here.
He gave me a back massage while we were fucking.
Did you get that?
WHILE WE WERE FUCKING.
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