I DON'T KNOW WHERE WE ARE WE ARE TOO FUCKING ELEVATED.
Me either! Fuck yeah, 12th and something. 12th and hamburger stand.
Just fyi NOT a good idea to drunkenly insert your NuvaRing after chopping jalepeno peppers
If someone cant be won over with guacomole and tequila they are not worth your time.
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
He said he wants to make an itinerary for the sex we'll have when I come home.
Do you knowwwwww you never ha to pee while lhr on eztacy
Not only is it unacceptable to be bar hopping alone at 5 o'clock. It is definitely unacceptable to do so with a lobster
She spilled creme de menthe on her crotch and I told her she looked like a menstruating Vulcan (costume idea!). Obviously, I went home alone.
Naw man, if he's crazy enough to jerk off on a public bus he's too crazy for me to fuck with
Please tell me you woke up next to the hot one cause his ugly friend is still snoring in my bed and my favorite panties are ripped.
Wingwoman of the year. I'll buy you dinner tonight and a new thong. It was THAT good.
I was blacked out when we met, so basically this will be a blind date.
You took nana to a bar?!
she suggested it
He tried to throw up into a beer bottle. It was a complete disaster. Vomit went everywhere. It put the Bellagio's fountain to shame.
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
Randomize