She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
My drug dealer just made me a sandwich at the local deli. Starting to question his street cred.
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
Hey since its national brother week is that eiffel tower option with your girlfriend still on the table?
Do you think that my Facebook profile picture kinda look like im being raped by a 10 foot polar bear ?
just saw sorostitutes streaking near the university president's house. thank you tequila day
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
I'm happy in my shell. My shell which consists of keeping guys in the friend zone and me masturbating...
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
That tampon felt like a stick in my vagina, I am never making a drunken tampon choice again. Friends don't let friends choose tampons drunk.
Was Mr. ROBOT good? I missed it. I just fucked dental hygienist on the trampoline in my backyard
He offered me my choice of the Abe Lincoln or Ben Franklin dick pic.
we've never stayed at a party for more than an hour. we always end up at a pizzaria. by ourselves. with no friends.
what else are best friends for?
I wish I was there so i could bitch slap his incredibly sexy face
You think the guy at the speed wash knows he needs to scrub the vomit off the side of my car?
He knew.
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