Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
Reason #82 that I need to get laid: my pubes are getting split ends.
I pulled out and her Nuva ring was around my dick... It was like I won a carnival game for adults... I asked her where my big stuffed bear was
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
No. I just want to cuddle and talk about our feeling. Of course this a booty call.
I'm bringing cupcakes to work today as an apology for my actions at the bar last night, my boss probably can't look at me the same ever again
Drunk yoga at 11 am turned into me sitting on the couch making fun of the girl in the instructional video. By the way, what the fuck is a third eye?
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
Your exhaustion is probably due to your rampant sexual urges and the fact that you live the same life as a raccoon.
I knew deleting his texts was a bad idea and I was right. I just used the last time we talked to help me figure out when I had my last period
I don't know which is worse, the fact that his name is Kevin or the fact that he has a pornstache.
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
He ate me out while I was wearing a canada goose parka and a dress hand crafted by a seamstress from yellowknife. I came while watching the northern lights. Most arctic orgasm ever.
Randomize
