idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
I kept waking up & seeing my Goodfellas poster and thinking it was a window with people crammed against it staring at me.
I guess the lighting in my room made it look like they were moving. I remember telling myself that they were watching over me and protecting me from the cops
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
just had sex with a midget and didnt wrap it... were totally gonna have a tv show :)
We spent three hours cleaning our room this morning. It was spotless and smelling good. I come home from work tonight and she has already smoked weed in it and "accidently" spilled vodka on the floor.
So bad news they put a private property sign on the tiger.
Until they install cameras or armed security i'll ride the fuck out of that jungle cat.
We have a drunk bartender with her nips a quarter inch from bein out buying us shots. GET HERE.
You just said the magic words
I love how my cats smell like pot.
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
My neighbor Chris is here. I am warning you, he is wearing a kilt I just saw his balls. Be incredibly careful that you don't see what I did.
I rigged together two of my vibrators for more power... I've created a monster.
I got punched in the face by a Cowboy last night. Then he bought me a beer cause o convinced security not to kick him out the bar. Start of a fairytale love story? I think so.
Why am I not blowing coke off your ass at my apartment?
First day back to class and I have already pulled out the hard liquor
Nothing says depression like laying in your bed stoned, naked, and eating a cupcake
Randomize
