my 3 year old cousin just woke up screaming "IT WON'T GO DOWN!'
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
I'm eating lunch next to a table of beautiful culturally-diverse women chattering away happily. It's like sitting next to a Yaz commercial.
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
We found him pissing on the sidewalk in his socks signing the national anthem. I love you summer.
Ok! I picked up an anti-celebratory bottle of champagne on the way to dinner for her going to rehab. That's how I feel about this...
Watching her eat just hurts me
Another memory: We offered for a stranger to live in our house under the condition that he took the garbage out because it's a 'blue' job.
We are the best.
Ps. We need to take the garbage out.
seriously though if NH has the largest penis size... the rest of America must be very disappointed.
This weekend I was almost blinded by a cumshot to the eye, so happy Labor Day I guess
Who knew a blowjob could cause this kind of crazy
He wasn't prepared for it
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
So you think Jesus would be proud of me for walking of shame into my apartment 10 minutes before I told my parents I'd be over for Easter?
Bootycalls can't go limp that's like against the law
Randomize
