drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
On a scale of affliction to ed hardy, how douchy is in there right now?
Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
On the one hand, she would be the biggest mistake of my year. On the other hand, she's here and drunk.
He texted me for drugs this time. Not sex. I dunno if I should be pleased it's not sex or disappointed that I come across as a druggie
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
you force-fed me gummy vitamins while screaming "I JUST WANT YOU TO BE HEALTHY" i have never been so terrified in my life.
You passed out while holding my hair during a blow job.. i think your gona have to earn back blow jobs
I like to think of you as more a magic eight ball of my life's journey?
You sent me snap chats of you guys having sex. Like plural. It was like flip book porn, I'm traumatized.
I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
I was mid hand job and stopped me because he wanted to "connect" which meant putting his thumb in between my eyebrows and a hand over my heart and closing our eyes...
Have bite marks on my arm where my temporary tat was Saturday night. Did someone try to bite Captain America or something?
One of the many mysteries surrounding the weekend...
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
We need to get me chipped asap
Randomize
