It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
i was so drunk he made me beileve the song was called "thanksgiving sex."
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
Sonogram pictures belong on a fucking fridge...NOT FACEBOOK!!
It's not my fault I help girls realize they're lesbians.
You missed a lot. I drank contact solution thinking it was water, vodka thinking it was water and some unidentified substance that reminded me of pine sol thinking it was water..
why is there an outline of nathan's body on my wall in whip cream?
The yard is growling at me WHAT DID U GIVE ME?
As soon as we had sex he stopped opening doors for me. That wasn't an exchange. Im still a god damn princess
I was intimate with him for twenty minutes and will be intimate with shame for twenty years.
My joke about liking my coffee like I like my men IS ABOUT TO COME TRUE.
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
Then it hit me - his penis wasn't a shiny new toy anymore and I wanted a new one.
Woke up at 5am in an elevator... Pretty much tells you how my weekend went.
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