you need to do more things constructive for your career. like wearing pants more often.
3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
i was like hansel and gretel. i puked a trail from mcdonalds to our place so i could find my way back in the morning
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
I found him crying and drunk, in my closet holding a picture of Tyler Perry. He managed to say"he's just so many people"
Just pulled an upper-decker at a hardware store. I believe I'm winning 8-2. It's obvious you don't shit enough in public.
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
I've been wearing the same clothes for 3 days and they're covered in franzia
Did you just tell me you watch cartoon porn because it's more real?
I just want to braid flowers into his hair and steal all of his pills.
Fuck these bullshit days. My underwear are still inside out.
I just woke up butt-naked in bed with a guy I've never seen..I reached into my bag next to the bed to get my phone and found a bag of shrooms, a handle of vodka, and 600 dollars that I've never seen. what do I do
enjoy it.
answer honestly do you think i can make a bloody mary with ketchup????
Randomize
