Man, ugly runs in her family
yeah, big time
Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
Don't be mad at me. I know peeing in your drawer is 1 thing and peeing on you while you're sleeping is another, but im sorry..i love you
God I'm so bored. I wish I had a baby or something to play with.
And this is exactly why you should NEVER have kids.
Getting stoned and going to costco. If i'm not back by dawn, you know what to do.
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
He just broke up w his most recent gf again, wish I could message her and be like it's not you he's gay.
You can't break up with me and ask me for a handjob on the same day. At least not in that order.
now that you've tased me I refuse to buy you flowers
just used my sex toy cleaning solution to clean my reading glasses. midterms are cramping my styleeee
He is just lying there. People are throwing money onto his chest as they walk by...
we passed out in our seats at the game for about 3innings. I guess they showed it on the big screen. nap n rally!
On the way out the door to work grabbed the wine glass on the floor left for the ghost of Elijah and chugged it. PASSOVER.
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
She stood up through my sunroof the entire drive home. screaming her ass off and singing free falling..
Randomize
