I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
the boobs are fake... i feel like i just found out santa isn't real.
do you know anything about the $5 bill with my name stapled to it in my purse??
How do I tell my mom that she just went to the gym with my water bottle filled with vodka...
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
Once again there IS no outside bathroom. Never has been, that is the balcony
its 4am and she invited me over to split a 'romantic bowl of frosted flakes'...really dude?...what do you think she's trying to say?...she better not be kidding about the frosted flakes though.
we already have meals planned for the weekend.
SEMEN IS NOT A MEAL.
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
I hope you get some kind or rare disease that makes your dick ties itself in a knot for fucking her you lucky bastard.
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
Wow dude wow that's sad man so sad. I dno't event wanna massturbate anymore due to teh sadness
I will consider today a failure if my nipple isn't bitten at least 😂
Oh is THAT how we're gonna play mini golf
Sometimes I wish I could tell all my past/present hookups what the nicknames that my friends and I have assigned them.
Randomize
