im watching my roommate bang this girl. she doesn't look like she's any good, because he has a bored look on his face...
You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
a guy from my religion class just walked in with a red cup. hello first friday of 2nd semester.
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
As if finding out the man you just had sex with is married isn't bad enough, it gets so much more awkward when his wife comes in to comfort you...
I know, I know. But we've discussed my friends and appropriate social behaviour, and I'm pretty sure topless karaoke was a no-no.
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
i was the only bi girl at the frat party. i felt like the last cresent roll at thanksgiving
I tried to smoke out of half a banana, and lit my nose hair on fire. So I feel like that sums up my life pretty well.
i don't know if this is a cannibal joke or a sexual innuendo, and i think that's a beautiful description of our relationship.
You came in last night, ate an entire avocado in silence, and then told me I should never accept rides from strangers. Not sure I even want to know what happened to you last night!
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
I lost my virginity to Adventure Time. DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND THE SIGNIFICANCE?!
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
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