She def said "you had your chance!" after telling me she had a boyfriend. Like a pile of dogshit lecturing me on how I missed out on having itself stuck to the bottom of my shoe.
We didn't go..parents came home with patron wanting to play drinking games --we asked no questions
just threw up in the bushes outside my lecture hall. sometimes i hate the freedom college gives you.
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
It's 4th of July all over again, we were chasing with the pool water.
He taught me where the gears in a five speed are with his penis.
Who ever is in the stall next to me is crying and it sounds like they're doing massive amounts of blow too. Finals for your ass huh.
If you've ever wanted to get filthy in a Catholic church before 2 on a Wednesday, I might be your guy.
Dad was on the deck drinking straight bourbon. He stopped, puked on his feet, and then continued drinking and talking about compound interest.
Seriously??? You send me boob shots with your husband and kids in them???
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
First night in my new apartment and I threw up in front of my neighbors door. Starting off this relationship strong.
Awk moment when I forgot to tell my hookup about visitor parking so he got towed
omg how embarrassing to not hear the delivery person knocking because you're singing "where are you Pizza" to the tune of "where are you christmas" too loudly
Okay penises are actually pretty exciting. The people attached to them are an entirely different story
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