Tell her she can't have a vagina
she's about as cool as a sandpaper handjob.
I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
She tried catching cigarette ashes on her tongue like snowflakes.
She told me she needed to clarify that we are not fuck buddies, we are best friends that have sex once in a while
Next time, showing us his dick should be his entry fee into your house.
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
no, she just came home, mumbled about being a gerbil out of water then ate half cooked chicken nuggets.. normal night
You kept running up to married couples, taking their pictures and begging for them not to get divorced
candyland with pharmaceuticals ... what could go wrong
I think my boss gives me work off weekends because he doesn't want me showing up hungover anymore..
Rule #61 of being a lady: never get fingered by a finger with a knuckle tattoo
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
Hahaha. I'm so high, this is gonna be so intense. Even the DVD menu scared the shit out of me.
I aimed for bossy but it came out slutty
Randomize
