one two three fourrrrnication!
Why is it people are always in costumes on Cheaters these days? Joe Greco literally just said, "It appears they get chased by a chicken with a chainsaw." WTF?
he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
you know that dress I got margarita and puke on? yeah, just returned it.
I was under the impression that I sent actual words. turns out it was a series of letters and question marks on a side note we still had sex
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
and then they started calling me 'Shitshow Shandra', which apparently i took as a compliment.
I wonder what my nutrition professor is going to think when I have to put 21 keystone lights, a bottle of merlot wine, and 5 rum and cokes and 4 shots of tequila on my dietary analysis
he tried to convince me he was a seal.. sound effects included. and then asked me to 'be his lady seal'.
I'm sitting here in nothing but my panties, eating beef jerky and reese's for breakfast.Today is not the day to expect me to make sound life decisions.
I like to balance the number of cups of coffee to bong rips in the morning before work.
seis de mayo is my least favoite holiday because i usually spend it in bed sobbing over my poor life decisions from the night before.
I told him he could fuck me once he could grow a beard. Never expected seeing him ten years later with a goatee and a great memory...
purchased gas station taquitos and condoms at 4 this morning. It has been magical..
short story short, i just screamed anal seepage in the middle of a diner.
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