so my bro's bff came over...we had an awkward "yeah we fucked and can fuck later, but let's just pretend it didn't happen in front of the family" hug.
no morals, dignity, or self respect ... just an empty condom wrapper and a facebook request
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
i would have smoked before this dance, how ever i have surgery Monday and I looked up weed and anesthesia and fatalities was mentioned, so i decided that it would be a bad idea
probs a good idea
i like the whole idea of life and being alive
you sure you're not high?
I went to grab his drink and my hand grazed his dick. It was magical.
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
I'll even be awesome and bring pizza for your family, just as a "hey thanks for letting a stranger get trashed at your house" gesture.
i officially have over $300 in my bank account. that's a year's worth of chipotle.
I thought I was smashed last night but the girl trying to pee in the fridge had me beat. True story.
I plan on having so much gay sex in our house while you gone.
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
Some girl came up to us crying that she lost her phone and you said "if it's meant to be, let it be"
I think my dove chocolate wrapper just told me to masturbate.
STOP SENDING ME NAKED PICTURES WHEN I'M TRYING TO TEACH. MONDAY TUESDAY 1-3 IS A DICK AND ARSE FREE ZONE
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