So i decided to deal with the awkwardness of last night by making out with all three of them
She said she didn't have time to shave "there"
Then she shouldn't have had time to order the lobster.
Can someone please explain to me why I woke up looking like Ziggy Stardust
Nothing kills the mood more than a jesus song.
I just made my bed perfectly before realizing that I'll be too drunk to appreciate it tonight
Alright I don't know how you'll link it to me but yes I left a nearly empty 12 pack on your trunk
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
Subtly mention that I'm not a lesbian. I would only go for rebecca's nipples because they're pierced and I like shiny things.
Yo send me the pic of me stickn my dick in the paint bucket last night
I may puke in class so I'm excited to see how that goes
I've injured myself in such a way that i am only capable of making love standing up now
You just put lesbians and Hogwarts in the same sentence. Of course I'm in.
I'm in the line at Chipotle thinking: "What combo will best prepare my body for the open bar I'm going to subject it to tonight?"
Honestly I am too high to watch videos of you jerking off right now
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
Randomize
